jamuna entertainment desk: Most famous singer in the world Ellie Goulding has opened up about her battle with anxiety and panic attacks in a personal essay for Well plus Good.
“My life completely changed when my career started taking off in 2010. I was thrilled, of course sharing my music with the world was a dream I’d been working toward for years but it was a lot all at once,” the 30-year-old singer explained.
Goulding’s debut album, “Lights,” peaked at No. 21 on the U.S. Billboard 200 chart in 2010. But as her star continued to rise, Goulding’s struggles only intensified.
“I started having panic attacks, and the scariest part was it could be triggered by anything,” she wrote. “I used to cover my face with a pillow whenever I had to walk outside from the car to the studio. My new life as a pop star certainly wasn’t as glamorous as all my friends from home thought. Secretly, I was really struggling physically and emotionally.”
The singer continued, “I think part of what sparked my panic attacks was not feeling confident enough to believe in myself I was scared I wasn’t as good of a singer as everyone thought I was. And as the stakes grew, I was afraid of letting everyone, including myself, down.”
Though Goulding still gave herself a pep talk ahead of last year’s Grammys, she has built confidence through boxing and kickboxing.
“I love that extra kick of adrenaline,” she wrote. “Keeping fit doesn’t mean spending hours at a gym; the key is to find a workout you really love.”
While Goulding still gets the butterflies before hitting the stage, she’s found a healthier alternative to cope.
“I still feel nervous before performing, or have pangs of anxiety from time to time, but it’s not crippling like it used to be. It took time, but I’ve accepted that everyone feels nervous before they perform,” she explained. “And now that I believe in myself more, that confidence comes through, whether I’m working out, singing onstage, or just hanging out by myself at home.”